Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Pope Goes Down On Little Boy?

Been thinking about the whole Muslim cartoon thing. Specifically, now that Iran - or one/some of its papers - will retaliate with Holocaust cartoons, what would be the worst cartoon? What would be the most offensive cartoon possible? What cartoon would make the Eric Altermans of the world take one step closer to becoming the full totalitarians they aspire to be?

Well, since the anti-Muslim cartoons attacked Muslims, I figured the response would be anti-Christian cartoons attacking Christians, but that's not what the response will be, apparently. The response, instead, will be anti-Jewish cartoons attacking Israelis. Got it?

Well, before Iran bungled their response to this outrage perpetrated by the corporations and governments of Western Europe, I was contemplating anti-Christian cartoons that would offend Christians.

I couldn't think of anything good, until I figured out why the anti-Muslim (anti-Islam, if you prefer) cartoons were so powerful. I'm not exactly sure why - many reasons, I'm sure, which I won't go into here - but the point is that it wasn't just any Mulsim-bashing cartoon - it struck a nerve. It hurt. Bad. So, how could an Iranian cartoonist best strike a nerve at Christians? I thought, "What is the worst, most horrific, most outrageously grotesque and hideous and anti-human and anti-decent and anti-moral thing Christians have ever done? What is something they were likely to still be very sensitive about?" Then I thought, "Sex abuse."

How would an Iranian cartoonist be able to capitalize on this sensitive nerve? Pretty obvious, I thought - draw the Pope about to give a blowjob to a little boy. Then, send the cartoon to the Philadelphia Inquirer for publication. We know, of course, that the Inquirer would publish this cartoon because that 'is the kind of work that newspapers are in business to do'.

Eagerly awaiting that 'Pope Goes Down On Little Boy' cartoon, Inquirer. I won't hold my breath.

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